Unexpected Blessings

It can be easy to focus on only the negative aspects of foster care, so I felt it would be wonderful to explain the positive, unexpected blessings the Lord has given us through this calling.

First, our children have become more compassionate and concerned for others. They are gentler, sweeter, and more sympathetic toward other children. I'm amazed to watch our 4-year-old naturally comfort another child or our wild 2-year-old suddenly become calm so he can hug a baby! And our oldest will tell people that we "help the babies," so he already has a testimony for himself. The sympathy God has brought out in our boys' hearts through this process is encouraging and reminds me that personal obedience to the Lord positively affects my children.

Next, having pictures of Baby M still posted in our house has brought joy to my heart. There was certainly a time when it was too painful to look at her precious pictures, but now they make me smile and remember the beautiful time God allowed us to be her family. And the beautiful time he allowed me to be her Mommy. What an honor!

Then there is the blessing of knowing I can survive. I used to fear loss and wondered if I would become stronger in my faith or reject it all together. But God has sustained me and literally held me up during my time of grief, so I know he always will. Plus, something has surfaced from my heart - a determination, or "grit" if you will - that surpasses any strength I could obtain through comfortable, painless living. I will survive even if another foster baby leaves our home. And I will survive if another 100 foster babies leave our home, because God is in control and he has a plan.

I have also learned to appreciate and voice my love for my husband more often. Many of you know I'm not necessarily the "gushy" type, but sometimes the Lord brings to mind how much more challenging my life would be without Carey and I literally gush thanks and praise to God. And I do my best to encourage my husband because he makes many sacrifices for us that I have overlooked in the past. Carey's deliberate obedience to the Lord strengthens our family and motivates me to also serve Christ with all my being.

Lastly, God has opened my eyes to the sorrow in the world and now I have a greater desire to help make it better. From broken families, to parent-less children, and an overwhelmed system that desperately tries to help each child in need, there is so much sadness. But there are also good things happening through the individual families that say "yes" to helping foster kids and together we are making a difference! Whereas sorrow can penetrate even the roughest exterior and make someone want to not try for fear of failure, the realization that there are others working for the same goal - to glorify God by helping his needy children - makes all the difference. And while only the Lord can fully exterminate sin and sorrow (and he WILL one day), I have the assurance that he has equipped me to be part of the remedy for now.

And now we wait for a new foster baby! It's bittersweet to know we will have the opportunity to love another child because we still greatly miss Baby M. But my heart is overjoyed to have another little one in our home soon. Every day when I wake up I think, "Today could be the day. Today I could be a new Mommy again," and the anticipation excites me. What will be her story? What will she look like? How old will she be? We can't wait to meet her!